If motherhood has taught me anything, it’s that we don’t actually “figure it out.” Every child, every situation, every season is different. The rules you think you’ll live by? They might not even survive the first week. And that's okay.
I distinctly remember a time (before kids) where I made a snarky comment about, “If they can ask for your boob, they’re too old.” And yet here I am (many years later), with a 2 year old who not only asks for a boob but specifies which one she wants. My how motherhood has humbled me. 😉
Each of my breastfeeding journeys has been completely different.
When our oldest son was born at rest, one of the nurses gently suggested that some moms find it therapeutic to pump and donate their milk. Honestly, I don’t think it would have crossed my mind otherwise. So I did. It was bittersweet and a gift I could give to another family (which ended up being a family who had their own struggles with infertility and loss 🤍). In the thick fog of grief, it gave me purpose. It was the one “new mom” thing I could still do, even though I didn’t get to bring Auggie home. It brought me comfort during a time that felt so cruel and in a strange way, it made me feel more connected to him.
Our daughter’s journey was rough. She started in the NICU with low blood sugars, weight issues, and a NG tube, which meant pumping instead of latching. I’ll never forget our nurse Kassie, who created a plan to help us start latching when I was terrified it might never happen. From there, it was…a lot. Lactose overload. MSPI. Nipple shields. Hospital grade pumps. Mastitis...twice. And colic so intense that it felt like the only time she wasn’t crying was when she was nursing. I changed my diet, I cried in the shower, and somehow we made it two years.
Our third has been the easiest. He latched flawlessly right after delivery, doubled his birthweight by 2.5 months and loves to eat! We had some familiar hiccups like lactose overload and MSPI, but I caught them early, adjusted my diet, and things have been smooth sailing ever since. Well… except for the part where my toddler decided to start nursing again. I often joke that she nurses more than him now. But I also have to laugh that for being my hardest breastfeeding journey, she’s still nursing at almost three.
Over the years, and especially recently, I’ve realized that these unexpected journeys have given me something else: the ability to help other moms through theirs. I’ve helped several of my friends through struggles with latching, lactose overload, MSPI and diet changes, pumping, and all the emotional pieces that come with it. And that has been one of the most rewarding surprises.
This isn’t to shame anyone who can’t or doesn’t breastfeed. This is a salute to:
The moms with cracked nipples and tired backs.
The moms who’ve cried over spilled milk, literally.
The moms who are touched out but still feed their babies.
The moms who’ve pumped in cars, closets, and questionable public restrooms.
The moms who can’t remember the last time they wore a “real” bra.
And especially the moms who swore they’d never nurse a toddler… until they did.
Whatever your feeding journey looks like, you’re doing an incredible job.
Happy World Breastfeeding Week